Wednesday, May 21, 2008

shiva, bpkumar and saidullu watches mumbai vs. hyderabad PART 1

20 to 30 odd studious students (???) from university and idrbt, decides to go for next ipl match between mumbai indians and deccan chargers (sachin's effect) at uppal stadium.

they all decide to meet directly inside the stadium once the match starts. (the thought is the result of the confidence they all gained by having mobile phones.) Niksi means to say that all thought that once inside the stadium, they will call each other and will be together to enjoy the spree. (clear hai na bey ??)


To saare bhai milne se pehle hi bichad gaye.

So instead of whole dataset together, some feature selection was done, and the group got divided into several clusters.

Our focus is on one such cluster which comprises of the following cluster points :

cluster center : saidullu alli yadav
point 1 : bpkumar
point 2 : mamudri siva kumar (important point)
point 3 : an outlier point trying to get into the cluster (we will name it mr. outlier)
point 4 : cluster member, who is siva's brother.. but he went out somewhere in the plane. (missing i mean)

ok. at present moment, cluster points are trying to contact each other from places unknown to us, with points having the luxury of mobile phones. (clusters not yet formed)

Saidullu (cluster center) gets call from siva : Hello saidullu, mobiles are allowed inside the stadium, so we will bring our mobiles. Primary reason to have mobile is we can track each other outside stadium. (NIKSI SECRET 1 : Secondary reason which siva meant but could not tell - We can talk to girlfriends incase the match goes boring)

Saidullu : Normoi bey.. i do not want to take heavy risk.. so i will not bring my mobile.

Siva : I and praveen are together. We both are bringing mobiles. Not bringing mobile is a risk. Because there will be a large crowd. So bring your mobile anna. (NIKSI SECRET 2 : actual intention of siva loving saidullu so much and forcing him to bring mobile was, saidullu owned the entry tickets. he he. So if no saidullu, means no tickets, means no entry, means no match. samjha na ??)

Saidullu : Siva waste fella, i am telling you, if i bring my mobile and they do not allow it inside, its all your responsibility.

Siva : (as always) ok anna, main hu na. you come. (marr gaya siva)

So now our points are outside the stadium (mind it!! still not together)

Now you will have to use your imagination. Just think out the situation i am describing below.

We are flying above the crowd. So we can see all the points. Shiva is at point A, Saidullu is at point B (not even 5 feet away from point A), Bpkumar is at point C (again not even 5 feet from points A and B). Points A, B, C form a small triangle. Points are not able to see each other.

Point A ie. siva calls point B ie. saidullu.
Siva : where are you re. cheppu re.
Saidullu : i am just outside the entrance gate re. where are you. come fast. (saidullu missing cheer leaders already).
Siva : Anna, i am also outside the entrance gate. You tell "exactly" where outside the gate.
Saidullu : i am exactly opposite to the gate re. You raise your hand.
Siva raises his hand. but both are back to back. So neither siva nor saidullu can see the other waste fella.
Saidullu : Wat re.. raise hand re.
Siva : raised. Cant you see me (waving the hands). Ok you also raise hand.
Saidullu also raises hand. Both are waving hands to nowhere. God knows to whom.

At very instant point C (Bpkumar) sees both of them standing back to back waving to the crowd and wonders what they are doing.
He comes and slaps both of them from behind. Both turns together towards each other. And the famous film scene of missing brothers meeting in crowd after ages of separation. But here the emotions are little different. Instead of hugging and kissing each other, they both started using language we cannot mention here.

Point is, our basic cluster is formed. (basic because point 4, (siva's bhai) still missing).
Our cluster with firm determination of not separating again in lifetime starts moving towards the entrance.

2nd Jhatka (specially for saidullu anna) : Cluster points see large (LARGE) banners showing sexy photos of mobiles, water bags, food bags, etc, etc, but with biiiiiiiiiiiiiig reeeeeeeeeeeeed crooooooooooooos on it. Niksi means to convey that cluster came to know that mobiles are strictly not allowed inside the stadium.

Our cluster is from idrbt. So born brave. So they decide to take risk of hiding mobiles and trying to get inside. And what luck they were having. There are three checkpoints before you are inside the stadium. And our cluster with impenetrable skills penetrates two checkpoints successfully with their mobiles still with them.

But as dr. murphy said, when there are equal chances of things going right and wrong, there are very high chances that thing will go wrong.

Bpkumar successfully penetrates the third checkpoint. ye ye ye. hip hip hurray.
Siva successfully penetrates the third checkpoint. ye ye ye ye. hip hip hip hurray.
Saidullu tries and gets caught. paaaaaaaaaaaaaapam.

Saidullu : (to siva and bpkumar) how come re. how come re.
Praveen : I did not bring my mobile re. I have kept it in bike tool box re. (bpkumar is smiling at saidullu. Saidullu is glaring with red eyes, first towards bpkumar and than towards siva)
Siva : Sorry anna. sorry sorry cheptunanu.
Saidullu : Now you asked me to bring mobile. So now you go and keep our mobile in pravin's bike. (The point worth noting here is, pravin's bike is approximately 2 kms away from stadium entrance)

Siva (puts condition with an emotion of request) : ok anna, i will go. but you too come na re.

Siva (helpless cow now, gets ready to get slaughtered), is having three problems now

problem A : To go till parking and put the mobiles and come back
problem B : Point 4 of the cluster (ie. his brother) is still missing. The last call he got from point 4 one hour ago was he is in secundrabad and will reach uppal in 10 minutes.
Problem C : He is only having Rs. 20 in his pockets. Might not be enough to go by some vehicle (bus, auto) and come back.

Siva is thinking about a optimal solution and finally makes a move.
He decides to focus on problem A. He catches an RTC bus thinking the ticket will cost only Rs. 2. Luckily the tc does not ask for a ticket at all. Ye Ye Ye.

He gets down -

3rd Jhatka : He enters the parking lot and suddenly gets a wonderful thought. "I dont know bpkumar's bike number, where will i keep the mobiles".

Just think. Bpkumar is not having mobile. Saidullu's mobile is with siva. Siva's mobile is with siva. Bpkumar's bike key is with Siva. And Siva is 2 kms away from cluster center, standing alone among some 6ooo bikes.

Only alternative he finds is to start trying on bikes which he thinks looks like bpkumar's bike. He puts the keys inside the first bike and EUREKA.. it opened. ye ye ye.. (so many ye's)

He puts the mobiles into the toolbox of the bike. And starts back with a strange emotion that something is fishy here. Something is wrong. Seeing the amount of luck he owes and his past experiences bounds him to come to the conclusion that the probability of hitting the right bike in first attempt is zero. So he walks back to bikes and looks for some help around. He finds a guy and gets a pen from him. He notes down the number of bike inside which he kept the precious mobiles (kitte ladkiyon ke number hote pata kya.. they are precious ofcourse, niksi ka mobile bhi precious hota). This is the only help he got from that guy.

He starts back towards the stadium.

He clears all the gates and is inside the stadium.
50000 people inside the stadium. Wonderful environment.

Niksi will end part 1 here with a review of siva's problems :

problem A : To go till parking and put the mobiles and come back - Solved (??)
problem B : Point 4 of the cluster (ie. his brother) is still missing. The last call he got from point 4 one hour ago was he is in secundrabad and will reach uppal in 10 minutes. - Still Missing
Problem C : He is only having Rs. 20 in his pockets. Might not be enough to go by some vehicle (bus, auto) and come back. - Doesn't matter much if he finds back his cluster.
Problem D : (Major problem) How to find the cluster ??????